One Ringy Dingy

I never bother to pick up the house phone when it rings since no one calling that number can speak English. There doesn't seem to be much point. I used to answer it but what ensued was just a back and forth of "Hello?" Allo. Hello? Allo. When I drop my "h's" and it becomes a volley of "Allos" I hang up. Most of the time, I find out who wants me when the line goes dead the next day....it's always the phone company wanting payment of my "debt."

Yesterday, it rang while I was downstairs. I thought about going upstairs to play a little game of Hello-Allo, because the caller was letting it ring forever, but I stayed in the kitchen with my book. This morning it rang again, and since I was right next to it, and the dog began to bark like it was an important call he was expecting, I answered it.

A few "Allo's" followed by a lot of "blah-blah-bah" in Azeri then me with a few "Sorry. English?" Then the inevitable switch to Russian followed by some more "Sorry. English?" from me. All the while the dog is barking his head off in the immediate background and I'm grateful my non-English speaking caller doesn't understand the words, "SHUT UP!!!" which are meant for the dog whose English isn't all that great either. I gave up and hung up but he called right back. More "blah blah blah" but there was someone in the background he was talking to this time. It seemed like it was really important that he communicate to me whatever it was he had to communicate but he and the other guy were laughing, so I laughed too at the whole situation. He eventually hung up on me because the Russian wasn't working either.

A few minutes pass and the phone rings again. I'm pretty sure now that this isn't the phone company calling about my "debt." This has to be a couple of guys who have figured out that they can say anything to the illiterate ditz on the other end of the line because she hasn't a clue. Just as I'm thinking about slamming the phone down, he gets out two words "telephoney money." It was the telephone company and these guys must have called around the office until they found someone who could give them two useful words in English. "Ah," says I......okay. Okay? Okay. The universal symbol of understanding.....except here it doesn't really mean that. It's actually the universal symbol of "I am pretending to understand you, so you will go away and leave me alone."

I think the sheep slaughter guy at the end of the street is branching out. Ali and I drove buy on our way to the grocery store today and there was a flock of about 8 turkeys standing just outside his hut/facility/home/meat-packing plant. I sat bolt upright in my seat and shouted, "TURKEYS!!" Ali, responds with a "Huh?" He has turkeys! Ali thinks the name turkeys is hilarious. "Like the country?" he asks. Yeps, like the country. I began to get wonderful visions of a delicious turkey dinner this weekend.

He tells me the call them "India Birds" Like the country. He also tells me they sell for around $18 a kilo. (So, the $99 frozen Butterball I saw at City Mart the other day was a bargain after all.) My chances of a turkey dinner are fading fast. But then Ali tells me he's going to stop at the guy's place and see how much of a deal he can get me on a turkey. OY! If he gets me a good deal is it kosher....er....maybe that should be "halal" to tell him I don't want the head, the feet, or anything that remotely resembles entrails to come with it? Can I send down my own plastic bag to bring it home in? Will he promise not to hang my turkey by the side of the dusty road until we come for it? Maybe I had enough turkey over the holidays.
I hope he gets rid of them before John get's back and see his favorite meal just waiting to be de-feathered for him. I think I will become a vegetarian as soon as my freezer full of Canadian beef is empty.
I haven't posted any pictures in a while......

A Corner of the Ministry Building Constructed by German POW's



Sunday Shopping



The Caravansarai in Sheki